Atavistic Thoughts, A Poem.

Troubling thoughts that have beginnings, bared naked like a single strand of care

Like un-carded sheep’s wool, dissembled, muddled thinking, like nits in my hair.

Originating but no ending, lack of any pattern, to distraction I am driven, yet to what end?

Maybe an offhand causative remark way back in my past, igniting tinder memories like a Careless spark. Tossing, turning, fears, readings, distressing worries mutely left unsaid.

Half remembered names and faces but to whom do they belong? From what fountain sprang? Van Morrison recorded twanging, like lyrics of a love song, to memory spoken long. Walking through misty moonlight, moon shadows for a friend, in my psyche keenly clinging bred.. .Unable to fathom or forget, in my sub conscious darkly lurking, denying

All attempts for me to erase, yet nervously still in hiding, where does it belong I dread..

Tensions around my shoulders, pain creeping down my back, Awake or asleep is it courage that I lack? My body is in agony, my mind it is in hell, with this unfathomable memory, but to what cause I cannot tell. What more resources can I utilize? What more tools do I possess? Such hauntings and imaginings, silently my inner core it caresses. Where can I turn to? Who’s assistance can I implore? Distress signals rocketed ashore.

Sin of my past life? Injurious words expressed? A mortal wounding of a body causes me nervousness, I confess. Will a re-birthing procedure prove effective, past regression a satisfactory conclusive test? Or should I speak with my confessor and my unnamed sin to Almighty God confess. How can I seek pardon or absolution when the stain on my soul is protested, even if I do detest. No token words spoken, pray how can I gain my rest?

Hypothesis spells were chosen, as my method to reach the past. Desperate causes require desperate measures, sure what soul can I entreat and endeavour with this mortal feat? Back through time we kept searching, layers of feelings drilling down, problems of origin, generational children abused and neglected found, voices unhealed, ignored, granted peace & comfort , painful events ousted, Restorative justice served at last..